Cryptic Signals
by My Hopeless Romantic
Summary: Ruka’s head hurt. It was tough trying to get over Mikan. It was harder when it was Natsume, his best friend, who’d ended up taking her away. What made Ruka’s life even more complicated was Hotaru Imai and her cryptic signals. RukaHotaru. #12
1. The Smell of Ambrosia

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gakuen Alice.  
**Dedication:** **HotaruRuka fans; I hope I do them justice. **  
**Author's Note:**_ This is a HotaruRuka,__ five chaptered story. It's my first try at HotaruRuka after one botched-up attempt that I'd rather not speak of. But I hope you enjoy, nonetheless._

* * *

**Cryptic Signals**

Senses were meant to be sent into _overdrive_.

-_My Hopeless Romantic-_

Chapter 1. The _Smell_ of Ambrosia

* * *

"Mikan-chan is so lucky! Natsume-sama is _so _cool!"

Ruka's writing hand immediately stilled on his notebook and he shrank into the small cubicle in the library in order to hide from the voices that he heard. It was a small giggle and a tiny whisper but he'd discovered, with the time he spent within the heart of the forest, his sense of hearing was far better than the middle-aged librarian posted a few feet away.

He didn't know why he tortured himself this way. He could've sworn the other day that he wasn't a masochist but here he was, subtly moving his head to the right in the direction he'd heard the feminine giggles.

"—I did, too! You never see Natsume-kun hold Mikan's hand in public but you know that dingy old Sakura tree? They're _always_ there! They're _so _cute! You know they were meant to be together when _Sumire_ gives her blessing!"

Ruka's heart lurched and he restrained himself from clutching the fabric of his shirt over the area his heart was supposed to be.

"I was there with you, Nonoko-chan. He actually let her _sleep_ on his _shoulder_! Natsume-kun would _never _let any other girl do that and get away with it!"

He leaned his head against the cool surface of the desk and sighed. Ruka knew he was being beyond pathetic. He knew Natsume deserved the girl of his dreams but at the thought of Mikan, with her big brown eyes and large heart, Ruka couldn't have begun to prepare himself for the onslaught of despair and hurt that he felt once they'd gotten together.

She'd been the only girl that made his heart flutter rapidly in his chest. She'd been the first girl to extend her generosity and concern to him without a thought about herself, holding nothing for her own personal gain. She was innocent and she was kind. Mikan Sakura had made him feel something that could only be love. How else could he explain the fullness of his heart and the way it beat like crazy when she came near?

Ruka breathed in slowly, frowning at the blurred lines of his textbook. He truly wondered why and _how _he could put himself through the same torture everyday, for the last three months. It should've made him happy to have his best friend and best girl get together. Ruka knew, deep down, Mikan and Natsume were meant to be together. He'd known for the five years he'd been pining after her and he knew his best friend better than anyone and Natsume had been pining after her for the same amount of time, if not longer, than he had.

The thought made it hard for him to swallow.

"I saw them kissing once!"

Ruka's head jolted up and his book bag fell to the ground with the startled jerk of his elbow. Chatter immediately ceased and Ruka quickly started gathering his books and pens, trying in vain to fight the heat of hurt from his face. His things were jammed into his bag in a pile of messy disarray that was rare for him but he couldn't seem to get out of the library quick enough.

He couldn't take it anymore. The feeling of coming in second to his best friend once again left a bitter taste in his mouth and blinded by the jab at his pride left Ruka stumbling into the hallway. He knew he shouldn't have looked back. He knew he should have run with the little bit of pride he had left but that little masochistic section in his heart that seemed to grow by day forced his head to turn just in time to glimpse the look of pity on Anna and Nonoko's faces.

The last thing he needed was pity.

The last thing he needed to _feel_ was jealousy.

He thought, after a few weeks had gone by, that he'd be able to get over his petty crush on Mikan. Of course, the 'petty crush' was putting it in rather simple terms. He'd tried every possible tactic to rid her of his mind. He'd tried ignoring her, to which she didn't seem to understand. She'd come up to him with a heartbreaking expression of hurt on her face and Ruka's resolve seemed to shatter when she asked sadly;

"_Ruka-pyon… are you m-mad at me?" _

Maybe it would've been a little easier if she hadn't decided to look up to scrutinize his face with her large, innocent and rather teary brown eyes. It was nearly impossible when Ruka saw the small quiver of her bottom lip which only made his heart beat faster. He never knew how to console a crying girl; his first love, no less. So he'd said the only thing he could;

"_N-no! Of c-course not, Sakura-san! I c-could never be mad at you…"_

She'd sniffled, perking up immediately with a cry of _"Really? Thank goodness! I was so worried…"_

And she'd promptly invited him to lunch with Natsume and her best friend, Hotaru, to which he couldn't have gotten out of if he'd tried. Ruka winced at the memory of the awkward lunch. Maybe it'd only been awkward for him after monosyllabic answers and the conversation that ensued between the three, excluding him. Even Natsume seemed to be speaking more than he was and that was disconcerting in itself.

It wasn't their fault that he had a rotten time. Or who was he kidding? Of course, it was their fault! If they'd never gotten together in the first place, things would've been a _whole_ lot easier. But there they were, Mikan and Natsume, the happy golden couple of the middle school branch and who was he? He was Ruka, just Ruka, the animal wrangler extraordinaire.

After avoiding them didn't work, Ruka had taken to simply watching and listening with a heavy heart. To be honest, he didn't know what else he could really do. He couldn't very well mentally kill them off. Nor would he want to. They were important people in his life and even though it pained him to no end, having to see them together, all other options either didn't work or were far too severe to contemplate.

Ruka sighed softly, hefting his book bag over one shoulder and tried not to look into the eyes of those passing him by. Apparently, it had been obvious that he'd been in love with the bubbly brunette girl. Apparently, it was obvious that he'd been heartbroken when the golden couple had gotten together. And apparently, everyone seemed to put it upon themselves to pity him. It made him feel sick to his stomach.

Couldn't they see that he was _human_…?

He closed his eyes briefly and sighed, hefting his book bag higher. If only he could just disappear for a moment and have his feelings magically vanish, he'd give _anythi_—

He felt the air get knocked out of him and stumbled backwards, apologies already at the tip of his tongue. "Oh, I'm sorr—" he blinked, slightly astonished, "Imai?"

Irritated, dark purple eyes met his and Ruka automatically felt himself stepping back to put some distance between them. He closed his eyes, expecting camera flashes in all directions but instead, he heard a rough sigh and a bored voice, asking, "What are you doing, Nogi?"

"I was…" _expecting you to take pictures,_ he thought.

"What?" she questioned monotonously, raising a slim, sculpted eyebrow.

"N-Nothing," he sighed finally, finding his gaze directed at the ground. Books were scattered on the ground, his as well as hers and Ruka immediately knelt down to pick them up in order to hide the dark blush on his cheeks, the heat collecting rapidly up his neck and into his face.

"Hurry up, Nogi. I'm busy," Hotaru stated blandly and Ruka resisted the urge to roll his eyes and drop all the books at the comment. Instead, he exhaled softly and urged his hands to quit shaking, picking up all of the foreign books to deposit into the stoic black haired girls' outstretched hands.

"Where's your robot, Imai?" Ruka asked, puzzled—looking around the petite girl to locate the missing robot. "I thought you never left without one to bring your things."

Hotaru shifted the books in her arms and Ruka expected a sigh of annoyance to come out of the girl's lips, but didn't catch it. Eyeing the pristinely trimmed black, boy-cut hair and the firm line of her lips, Ruka inwardly chuckled, beating himself over the head for thinking that Hotaru Imai would let somebody know about her struggle. She was much too independent, he thought.

"Why should it matter to you?" Hotaru replied, a small frown on her face. "It doesn't matter where it is because you'll make a satisfactory substitute."

She smirked and still in the clutches of surprise, Ruka gaped open-mouthed as his body moved on its own accord, hands outstretched in order to receive the pile of books the inventor dropped into his hands. "Come along, Nogi. I trust you know where my lab is," she spoke, a lilt of amusement in her voice.

"B-but Imai, I have other thin—"

"Complaining will get you nowhere, blondie," she smirked, sidestepping him to walk past the library, "Just be happy I'm not taking pictures of you when you're red in the face like that."

Ruka was at a loss for words and quickly shifted her books onto one arm, picking up his books and tossing them roughly into his bag before trailing after her with a frown on his lips. He supposed she was right. Anything was better than those blackmailing photos the girl was so fond of selling. Looking at the back of her head, Ruka wondered briefly how such a small girl of her size could expel so much horror to his life. Blackmail from incriminating photos seemed to be her best friend and he thought, once again, how strange it was for a withdrawn girl like Hotaru Imai to be able to hold the love and best friend title that Mikan readily gave her.

_Mikan…_

Ruka bit his lip to dispel the incoming thoughts of the cheerful brunette and focused on the dominating girl before him. Why was he carrying her books anyway? Shouldn't he be throwing them all over the floor? He mentally laughed, shaking his head. He could never do something like that. His conscience would never let him.

… _you're too much of a gentleman…_ his conscience mocked, _and it doesn't even matter. No matter how nice you are, Mikan will never love you like she does Natsume…_

Ruka frowned, knowing only that it was the truth.

"Stop frowning," Hotaru called over her shoulder, turning back briefly for Ruka to glimpse the paleness of her skin, "If you keep up with the rate you're going, you'll be so ugly, no one would buy your pictures."

Wryly, Ruka shook his head. "To think for a second, I thought you cared about me, Imai," Ruka replied callously, surprising himself with the sharpness of his voice. He looked down immediately, barely catching the ghost of a smile on Hotaru's face with his sharp, blue eyes.

She stopped, turning around fully and took two steps closer to him. She was so close, in fact, that Ruka felt his heart beating quicker with the knowledge as the distant, powerful girl stood before him. Faintly, he could smell the tantalizing scent of ambrosia that had always enticed him in the heart of the forest. A smell he would've never pinned the youngest Imai of sporting. The musky scent tickled his taste buds and Ruka swallowed thickly as his stomach flipped with pleasant surprise.

"I-Imai, what are you—"

"Doing?" she questioned slyly, smirking at his flushed face, "Really, Nogi. You should know better than anyone, it's nothing personal, it's just business."

She pulled away, sadistic smirk still in place before resuming the walk to her lab. Ruka, the lovely odor no longer clogging his senses, blinked and breathed out swiftly. _Really_, he inwardly scolded himself, watching her retreating figure, _so she smells nice, so what? It doesn't change the fact that she blackmails you every other day._

Gathering his wits, Ruka hurried to catch up to the black-haired girl whose figure had disappeared upon turning a corner. Blue eyes softened as he pondered briefly about the smell that had made the girl he'd always thought to be boyish, into so much of a female. He shivered slightly and started at the sight of Hotaru opening up her door.

Ruka stepped in cautiously, his eyes darting around suspiciously looking for traps of some sort. When he'd made it inside without being harmed, he took in the large lab with keener eyes, noting how organized and agonizingly neat the room was.

"Where did you want me to put your books…Imai?" he asked, looking for the girl in question. He finally spotted her leaning against the wall near the door, looking at him with intense amethyst eyes that made his arms weak.

_The books… the books are heavy and they're taking a toll on your arms… nothing more…_

She remained quiet for a moment before looking past him and gesturing with her eyes, "On the desk."

Shyly, he placed the books down and groaned, stretching his arms and winced when he heard them pop. He refused to meet her gaze and shrugged his shoulders, "I—um… I guess I'll see you later, Imai…"

"Whatever."

He heard her feet shuffle as she walked toward her desk, the familiar, achingly sensual smell of ambrosia meeting his nostrils as she passed and he resisted the urge to shiver before he sighed deeply. He'd almost made it out the door, reluctantly moving away from the odor before she stopped him in his tracks.

"Nogi," she called softly.

Ruka found himself turning around a little too enthusiastically, eyes wide and expecting. "I-Imai, wha—"

Several consecutive flashes of lights and the hiss of her telltale camera blinded him until he stumbled out the door, putting his hands up in surprise and defense. Finally, he sputtered, "Imai, what are yo—!"

The flashes stopped and blearily opening his eyes, Ruka barely made out the turn of her lips into a smirk, her parting words, "I told you, Nogi. It's nothing personal, just business."

He heard her slamming the door in his face, the warm smell of ambrosia, once again, hitting him in the face. And as his vision slowly cleared, Ruka remained standing out her door, mouth agape, briefly wondering how such a girl like Hotaru Imai could emit such a lovely scent.

* * *

_My Hopeless Romantic_


	2. The Sound of Laughter

**Disclaimer:** If we're being honest, I don't own Gakuen Alice.  
**Author's Note:**_ Sorry for the late update. Thank you very much for your input last chapter. I really didn't expect that much interest but I'm glad I was proven otherwise. Happy reading._

* * *

**Cryptic Signals**

Senses were meant to be sent into _overdrive_.

-_My Hopeless Romantic-_

Chapter 2. The _Sound_ of Laughter

* * *

"Would you just _look _at them?" Anna sighed softly, clasping her hands together. She propped her chin atop her knuckles and rested her elbows on the cafeteria table, gazing dreamily off into the distance. "You can just _see _the way he looks at her… it's _so_ romantic!"

Ruka shifted a bit in his chair and quickened the strokes of his hand over Usagi's head, pretending to be indifferent to Anna's sighs and dreamy comments. Her midnight counterpart of a best friend was nowhere to be seen and Ruka sighed at the company that he'd submitted himself to. There was Anna, Sumire, Koko and himself at the table and from what he'd managed to glean from Anna's earlier comment, Natsume and Mikan were well on their way.

He didn't dare take a look behind him and wished fervently that he'd taken the chair that overlooked the entrance to the cafeteria. At least then, he might've been able to make a quick getaway.

"It's almost disgusting," Sumire sniffed, eyes drifting to the cafeteria line. "God, I'm hungry. When will that goddamn line _move_?"

"You could just stand in line like a normal person so you don't have to wait as long for—"

Sumire interrupted Koko with a flick of her wrist, "You think _I'm_ going to wait in line with a bunch of losers? No way! Why don't you go?"

Ruka almost smiled when he heard Koko mutter, "I'm not _hungry_, that's why."

Koko was easily one of Ruka's favorite people in Alice Academy. Not only was he achingly loyal to the whole of Class B, but his humor and blunt honesty was a sure way to lighten up the mood. Only, of course, if Koko wasn't turning his blunt honesty on _him, _only then did Ruka not mind.

Koko flashed an easy smile his way and Ruka glared, internally wishing Koko hadn't heard his thoughts. Abruptly, Ruka's body stiffened with dread and the feeling made his blood run cold. Mikan and Natsume were fast approaching and if things happened like they usually did, Koko was in for one _painfully_ repetitive soap opera that transpired in his head.

Once again, Koko cracked a smile before turning back to Sumire, "God, you're whiny!" Koko exclaimed, a goofy grin on his face. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you wanted me to wait in line _for _you."

"Don't _test _me, Yome," she snarled tightly, sharp nails digging into the table in plain view. "It might be better for your health, though. Maybe then I won't have to dig my nails into your face."

He put his hands up in surrender before snickering openly. His head immediately snapped upward and another large grin encompassed his face, "Hey Mikan-chan!" His gaze moved smoothly in Natsume's direction where he sent him a teasing, meaningful glance, "—and Natsume."

Ruka's breath hitched and his head, working without a command from his brain, it seemed, snapped up to regard the happy pair.

"Hi guys!" Mikan chirped. She looked down at him with a bright smile, "Hey Ruka-pyon!"

He swallowed thickly, eyes automatically darting over to his best friend's in time to see the corners of his eyes soften and the short incline of his head in greeting, "Ruka."

"Good afternoon, Sakura," he replied as normally as he could. He tore his eyes away from Natsume's gaze, looking just at the spot past his shoulder, pausing, "Natsume."

He felt Natsume stiffen just the slightest and felt the familiar jerk of guilt within his own body.

"It's Mikan, Ruka-pyon!" Mikan huffed playfully, bounding over to the seat beside him. "You've never called me Sakura since we turned eleven!"

The brush of fabric against his bare elbow made Ruka freeze and he couldn't help the jolt of his eyes that immediately met Natsume's. The astonishing swirl of red that spoke of Natsume's concern made Ruka's stomach sink low into his feet and he became infinitesimally aware of the silence that encompassed the table. Even Mikan found the silence bewildering.

"Say, I heard Hotaru got two more wealthy clients to visit her the other day," Koko piped in, sending Ruka a look that distinctly meant _'You _owe _me'_. "She's pretty awesome, huh Mikan-chan?"

Mikan visibly brightened, clasping her hands together with a grin, "Of course! That's Hotaru-chan for you! She's the best at _everything_!"

Natsume snorted and Mikan immediately rounded on him. "What's that supposed to mean?" she griped impatiently, "She _is _the best at everything! You heard Koko. Two more clients asked for her! Two!"

"Even if she did get two more clients, it doesn't change the fact that she's a greedy fiend," Sumire huffed, crossing her arms atop the table. "She gets loads of rabbits for her inventions and she _still _has to blackmail me!"

"It was your fault you couldn't control your Alice in the first place," Koko admonished with a pleasant grin, "Ah, that was a good day."

"Was not!" Sumire blushed hotly, swiping Koko's shoulder with a violent swing. "She _planned_ it," she spat. "She purposefully created a mouse contraption just to spite me! Evil, evil _witch_."

"Hey—!" Mikan started to protest, her brown eyes alight with amusement and offence. "She's my best friend!"

"We've been told," Natsume replied dryly. "I still wonder how that ever happened."

"I'll have you know that Hotaru is the best friend a girl only _dreams _of having!" Mikan defended, lifting her chin up. "She's like… my Ruka-pyon!"

Ruka's heart jumped at her words and his eyes widened when he glimpsed her bright grin. Darting a glance over at Natsume, Ruka leaned back against his seat, furiously petting Usagi when Natsume held his gaze with a solid, curious stare.

_She didn't mean it that way_, Ruka winced. Natsume's eyes seemed to be saying the exact same thing but there was a grim, apologetic expression on his face and that was the _last _thing he needed from his very own best friend. Ruka nodded imperceptibly to Natsume, eyes withdrawn and trying to convey the message that yes, he understood what Mikan had meant and yes, he was okay with the two of them being together.

A small, relieved smile graced Natsume's face and Ruka's heart softened, remembering like he frequently did, how much Natsume deserved to be happy. Hesitantly, Ruka returned a gentle smile of his own and the hand, that seemed to thirst for his rabbit's baldness, stilled. His heart softened even more when Natsume tugged on one of Mikan's pigtails, wrapping one of the clusters of Mikan's hair around his finger thoughtfully with a stoic expression on his face. The tender touch in his eye wasn't missed by his best friend, or anyone at the table, for that matter.

It still hurt. By God, it hurt but what kind of best friend would he be if he was consistently worrying Natsume like this? What kind of a best friend was he if he couldn't get past this _one _obstacle that was testing their friendship? Ruka wasn't stupid enough to think that Mikan wasn't worth fighting over because God only knew how much she was worth it. But Ruka knew when to concede and the only guy that he'd _ever _wish to get Mikan, other than himself, was Natsume and that was exactly who'd gotten her. And at the back of his mind, Ruka knew that he was happy, even if a small part of his heart wanted to scream otherwise.

"—she would." Mikan insisted, folding her arms with a huff. "Hotaru would do _anything _for me, especially if I needed it!"

"You need your rabbits and yet, that doesn't stop her from making you pay interest, does it?" Sumire piped in dismissively. "And Koko, if you don't stop reading my mind, I'm going to swipe off your bits until you're no longer a man!"

Koko stopped his snickering abruptly and cocked his head, conceding, "Okay, okay! It's not my fault you're thinking about how cool it'd be to have Hotaru as a best friend!"

"Only because she scares everybody away!"

"She does _not _scare everybody away!" Mikan maintained and Natsume snickered softly, looking as if he'd beg to differ but managing to keep it to himself at the last second.

Ruka let a good-natured grin spread across his face before he asked, "Speaking of Imai, where is she?"

"Oh, she's in the library," Mikan responded offhandedly, grinning as Koko danced away from Sumire's claws. "She said she was going do some research before dinner."

"Alright," Ruka stood up, letting Usagi jump to the ground. "I'm going to look for her. You guys have fun."

And it surprised Ruka when he'd actually meant it. Usually, after Mikan and Natsume had gotten together, everything he'd said was half-hearted and meant only to be polite. But this time—this time he _meant _it. What was that supposed to mean?

"Why are you looking for Hotaru-chan?" Anna asked, finally making her voice heard in the conversation. "If she's working, she might not be in the mood to see anybody."

Mikan shook her head, "That's not true! Hotaru-chan won't mind. She likes talking to people!"

A silence fell over the table and Ruka laughed nervously. "She took some pictures of me the other day actually, and—"

"Oh," everyone was nodding, smiling these secretive little smiles. "Go on, then," Sumire shooed, nodding towards the exit.

Ruka shot a questionable glance at Natsume in which he returned with a small smirk before shrugging. Ruka waved a hand into the air before ushering his pet rabbit out the door of the canteen.

Ruka didn't honestly think he was going to find Imai. He'd only said that in order to get out of the perfect picture that was Natsume and Mikan. He didn't want to be a third wheel, after all, and even if he was sort-of-somehow coming to terms with the fact that two of his most important friends were together, it didn't stop him from being uncomfortable.

And if Anna's parting words and Koko's insistent whines for Sumire to accompany him to Central Town were any indication, the rest of the group had more or less the same idea as he.

So it came as a surprise to him when he'd found himself in front of the library, with Usagi at his feet, looking up with large, black eyes and asking, _What are we doing here, Ruka-sama?_ He didn't think that question warranted an answer. Not that he could've provided one, even if he wanted to.

Pushing the doors open, Ruka glanced around the place, unusually filled with streams of students on the computers and riffling through the selections of books hoarded in bookcases around the lower part of the library. Ruka wasn't new to the place and he sure wasn't new to the wide berth near the corner of the library where only one inventor could possibly create. Taking a deep breath, Ruka ushered Usagi into his arms and strode over to the corner, winding his way through the students who still managed to send him looks of concern and admiration.

She was hunched over a large, leather bound book with a couple more off to the side of the table when he cleared his throat. Bored velvet eyes met his expectantly.

"Nogi," she drawled coolly, with an almost suspicious gleam in her eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"No 'hello', Imai?" Ruka returned with a small smile, taking a seat in front of her. His grin widened when he glimpsed her narrowed eyes and broadened once more when she returned, "I'm busy. I know you're anxious to play the role of 'model' again but I can't today."

"I'm never in the mood to play model and you know it, Imai," he griped, watching as her eyes turned back to the large book in front of her. She made a noise of mild disinterest, methodically scanning over the pages of the book, jotting down notes in her notebook before flipping the page to repeat the process.

"Running away from Mikan again?" she asked lightly without diverting her gaze from the book. "I find it hard to believe you'd want to pay me a visit willingly."

Ruka blinked, tensing immediately. There was nothing to hide from Hotaru. She knew everything anyway and trying to fib his way out of it would only end up with his embarrassment and her triumphant victory—as usual. "To be honest, Imai – yes, I was." He watched Usagi hop over to Hotaru's elbow and nudge it timidly; smiling as she blinked in what could only be mild surprise, "Though it's not as hard watching them as it was three months ago…"

Her eyebrow rose with the semblance of interest as she mindlessly rubbed Usagi between delighted, flattened ears. "I'm impressed, Nogi." Ruka furrowed his brow in confusion and she rolled her eyes, reiterating, "I would've thought it'd take you at least five months to hit this stage. My calculations dictated a minimum of five months filled with wounded expressions, quick getaways and a short temper."

A burst of unexpected laughter escaped him and Ruka clutched the edge of the table, urging the well of mirth away upon seeing Hotaru's curious albeit stolid expression. "Calculations?" Ruka's eyebrow lifted. "How on earth do you use calculations when it comes to somebody's emotions, Imai?"

"Simple." She picked up her pen and with a hint of hesitation, tore a piece of paper from her coil notebook. Ruka didn't fail to notice the wince she tried to contain when it left behind jagged pieces of paper within the coils. Chuckling, Ruka took her notebook and removed them, his ears picking up Hotaru's irritated, and surprisingly enough, feminine sigh. He really shouldn't have been so startled but he was still getting used to the fact that Hotaru was a girl. Granted, she was different from the other girls and never showed any signs of incapability or frustration. It made Ruka smile when he learned she could get worked up, or as worked up as Hotaru _could _be, over such a small thing.

"There. Good as new." He tried to catch a smile or _something_ appreciative in her countenance but Hotaru divulged nothing. Instead, she took hold of her pen and started doing a rough sketch of what looked to be _him, _making short hand notes in the margins and arrows pointing to both his head and heart, briefly explaining something that related to the five years he spent willingly ripping his heart out of his chest and participating in an unrequited love that wasn't reciprocated the way he wanted. Then, she related those five years to the fact that five months would be the most probable estimation due to the fact that his best friend was a part of the relationship and the deep respect and love Ruka held for him made things somewhat easier to take but since he was such a total sap, that he'd obviously still have an affection for the both of them that wasn't recommended. With less words, no romantic descriptions and a hint of scathing undertone.

Or, at least, that's what he thought. Ruka couldn't be quite sure but he did remember hearing something about '—five years and the self isolation would result in five months…" he'd lost her after that. He briefly chuckled at his summary, wondering why he added things like '_unrequited love'_ and '_ripping his heart out willingly' _to Hotaru's explanation so offhandedly.

"There is usually a logical explanation for these things. Conclusions can be inferred when using observations of the specimen to relate and compare to other experiments and the data collected there, though personality does play a large role in the final results," Hotaru finished, setting down her pen and pushing the piece of paper at him, across the table. "I guess you aren't as predictable as I thought you'd be, Nogi."

Ruka found himself grinning, barely catching her last statement. "Gee thanks, Imai. Coming from you, that means a lot."

She frowned and Ruka could barely contain the shiver that ran the length of his back when Usagi's nose twitched, nuzzling its face deeper into Hotaru's uniform with delight. The chill came from Usagi's obvious pleasure taking in her scent and Ruka could practically _hear _the rodent purr, if it could.

_Traitor…_

"How did you notice?"

Ruka tore his gaze away from his pet rabbit and he felt the glare on his face dissolve at her expectant, intense stare. "Uh—notice what?"

"The change, Nogi," her tone was impatient, "The change in yourself in the last three months."

Ruka shifted uncomfortably and settled his gaze on the bookcase behind her head. Shrugging, he replied, "I don't know, Imai. It's just something I realized, you know? Suddenly, something just feels… different." He chanced a glance at her face, horrified that he felt so shy and seemed to want to shrink away at the cruel smirk on her face.

"Different," she deadpanned slowly, an eyebrow arched. "I see," she murmured, "Interesting."

"You have no idea," he muttered, eyes trailing from her to Usagi. Then, she laughed.

_Laughed._

Ruka sat bewildered for a second, barely comprehending the sound of light, not quite childish but relaxed laughter that escaped her, eyes with more mirth than he'd ever seen them with. Granted, he didn't make it a point to willingly sit in her company but if she laughed like that… Kami, he didn't honestly think he'd mind the next time around.

He didn't remember seeing her standing up with her notebook but when he blinked, there she was, standing over him, with a slightly tense but cool expression on her face. "Oh, I have an idea," she smirked smoothly, tucking her notebook under her arm. "See you around, Nogi."

She turned, short black hair swishing just the slightest before she looked back with dark eyes and said blandly, "I'm sure you can deal with those books."

Her name was at the tip of his tongue, ready to rebuke but Ruka bit his lip, finding himself unable to start. Instead, he watched her walk away, students creating a solid path for her as she walked toward the exit. He expected her to turn back for a second. He expected to see some sort of gesture to reassure him that whatever was… _churning_ in his stomach would go away. He needed to see _something_. But she didn't turn like he wanted her to and the next time he blinked, she was already out the door.

He bit his lip, watching Usagi bound toward the stray piece of paper, its nose twitching curiously before taking one end into its mouth.

"_Oh,_ _I have an idea…"_

Did she? How could she possibly understand how he managed to feel different when _he _couldn't even understand it? Ruka sighed, tugging the small, meticulously drawn diagram from Usagi's mouth, studying the neat cursive and the impressive, sure strokes of her diagram. His eyes fell onto the stack of large textbooks, piled one on top of the other in a neat collection at the corner of the table. He didn't know why he did it. It seemed, wherever Hotaru was concerned, Ruka didn't understand why he did a lot of things. Nevertheless, he stuffed the drawing into his pocket, picked up the first book and walked over to the bookcases, still replaying the sound of her laughter in his head.

* * *

_My Hopeless Romantic_


	3. The Touch of Hands

**Disclaimer:** No, no, no. Gakuen Alice isn't _mine_. I'm just a loyal peon basking in Tachibana-sama's creation.**  
Dedicated to:** _crimsoneyes44_ - for insistently slapping me upside the head to get me to update this story and for writing that amazing poem that totally inspired me to continue this story. You da _wu_-man!

* * *

**Cryptic Signals**

Senses were meant to be sent into _overdrive_.

-_My Hopeless Romantic-_

Chapter 3. The _Touch_ of Hands

* * *

Ruka looked out the window with a grim expression on his normally warm features and couldn't help wringing his hands with anxiety. Night had fallen, painting the sky as it usually did, with dark navies and blacks with pinpricks of stars littered haphazardly across the sky. It would've been a beautiful sight, Ruka thought, if he wasn't feeling like a wrestler had just sucker punched him in the face or threw a boulder into his stomach.

It was 8:20PM on a typical Thursday night at Alice Academy where the sun shone all day and by night, stars twinkled brightly against smooth black canvas.

All day, however, Ruka had been feeling sick with himself.

It wasn't the ideal way to appreciate such a beautiful day but Ruka couldn't help it. With a sigh, Ruka pulled himself away from the window to move slowly across the room to his bed. Looking at the blue covers and the lonely row of pillows, Ruka ran a hand through his hair before flopping onto the large queen bed set all Triple Stars received.

_There was honestly something wrong with him…_

Dramatics aside, Ruka turned on his stomach and glanced briefly at the window.

He should probably see Natsume, Ruka admonished himself like he'd been doing every Thursday since that one, fateful day three months ago. Ruka sat up, blinking at the large window once again, and if he tilted his head at _just _the right angle, he could only partially make out the silhouette of a figure he'd known since his childhood.

_Natsume…_

The thought made his stomach twist and Ruka winced, feeling the drop of self-loathing he'd been all too familiar with for the past few days. Running a hand through rich, blonde locks, Ruka focused his eyes on Natsume's form once more before groaning, exasperation etched in every one of his movements before he managed to crawl off the bed and head to the window once more.

He'd always been waiting there, Ruka thought vaguely, pressing a hand against the glass that separated them. Ever since that first Thursday, they'd had some kind of unspoken reassurance, a promise that made both boys throw open their windows and climb onto the rooftop in pajama bottoms and tops and messily blown hair. There rooms weren't right beside each other, much to their displeasure. Natsume's room was at the very end of the hall, isolated in his own dark little corner whereas Ruka's seemed to be in the midst of all of the other boys.

But that didn't deter them.

With Natsume's reputable skills as a Dangerous Ability type Alice, he'd quite easily jumped from his turret-like wall extension by his mini-balcony to the main roof, where he strolled languidly past a dozen windows before reaching the mean area between both of their rooms, coincidentally in front of Koko's bedroom.

They'd kept to tradition throughout the years. Natsume seemed to need their sessions of solitude every Thursday back when they were eight in order to cope through the merciless training and mind-numbing missions he'd been forced to partake in. Recently, however, he hadn't needed Ruka to return to a semblance of peace. When Mikan had arrived and even after the multitude of troubles she seemed to bring along with her, Natsume arrived promptly on the rooftop at 8:30 PM every Thursday night with a small, almost nonexistent and infinitely content grin on his face.

The thought made a smile tug at Ruka's lips but another thought, brief but lasting, flashed behind his eyes and as quickly as it had come, the smile disappeared.

When Mikan and Natsume had gotten together, Ruka had made it to their unscheduled Thursday rendez-vous almost without having to think about it. Natsume had been waiting there, as usual. No matter how early Ruka climbed out his window, Natsume always seemed to be the first one there…

Ruka shook his head and concentrated on the sullen memory of the Thursday following the Golden Pair's coupling. Natsume had looked up; his eyes a little brighter than usual and had greeted him with the usual nod and casual call of his name, "Ruka."

At the time, he remembered being angry with him, wondering how Natsume could greet him with such familiarity, as if he hadn't just taken the love of his life… Nevertheless, Ruka reminisced, if Natsume wanted to play it like things hadn't just changed between them, then Ruka would play along.

But he found out the hard way that 'playing along' would be far more complex than he'd imagined. The atmosphere around them had been thick with tension and Ruka remembered visibly shaking with unsuppressed emotions. Finally, with a heavy sigh, he'd gritted out that he was tired and needed sleep before he'd jumped into his window and curled into the fetal position on his bed.

He hadn't gone back there ever since.

He blinked, clearing his vision and caught sight of Natsume's lazy form laying on the rooftop, still waiting. Turning his head with a quick jerk, Ruka caught the glow of red lights that blinked 8:43PM before he sighed, swallowed, puffed out his chest and threw open the window.

Natsume's body visibly stiffened before he snapped his head in Ruka's direction, looking caught off guard by Ruka's sudden emerging form from several windows down from where he was sitting. On another day at some other place, the look would've made Ruka laugh but today, this Thursday night wasn't one for pleasantries.

He watched as Natsume unfolded his arms from behind his head and sat up, eyes riveted on his form until he'd stopped in front of him and Natsume muttered slowly, "You came."

The relief and surprise in his voice didn't go unnoticed and Ruka shrugged shyly, folding his body to lie onto the roof, folding his hands under his head to stare at the vividly painted sky.

He didn't look at Natsume but could feel his warm gaze and hear the rustle of his pajamas as he lay again, stiffly onto the roof. After a long moment's pause, Ruka murmured, "I missed this."

Natsume grunted his agreement, "It's been lonely."

"Yeah," Ruka agreed, turning his head slightly in Natsume's direction, "—it was for me, too."

Something in his countenance and his body language told Ruka he wanted to know what brought upon his unexpected arrival and Ruka frowned, glaring hard at one of the brightest stars in the sky.

As he glared, he could feel Natsume's Alice rippling softly in slow vibrations, agitated and razor-like, unlike his usual soothing, calm waves. He probably didn't know about the vague waves of his Alice that changed with his mood, but Ruka knew. He'd known for years how Natsume's Alice waves changed. On usual Thursday nights, the waves were warm, slow and soothing. When he was troubled, they were craggy, uneven and a touch cooler than usual. When he was angry, the waves were fierce, smoldering hot and blisteringly sharp. On rare days like this, when his emotions were all over the place, Natsume sent out waves that bordered between troubled and peace.

And since it was so rare for him to see Natsume so agitated and unsure, Ruka's thoughts were in mild disarray, so unused to this sort of atmosphere between them.

_You did this_; his mind was quick to point out.

Ruka inwardly hissed and closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry, you know," he muttered quietly, his voice slightly uneven, "—I was being stupid and irrational and you didn't deserve it."

If Natsume noticed the hard edge that frequented the words he'd just spoken, he didn't make any indication that he had. Instead, he returned, "Ruka, it's fine. It wasn't your fault."

Like a wounded snake, Ruka grimaced and hissed, "You don't actually believe this is your fault, do you Natsume? As much as I'd like to pretend I hadn't been a pissy little girl about everything, I was and that won't change." He looked over to Natsume who kept his eyes riveted to the sky and sighed. "Look, I know I haven't been much of a friend lately but-"

"Ruka." Natsume interrupted, running a hand through his hair with a rough shrug. "I get it. It's not your fault."

"I know I'm not a genius like you but I'm not stupid enough not to know when something's my fault." Ruka scowled, pressing his eyelids closed before muttering, "You might not want to listen to this but I'll feel bad if I don't tell you." With a grumble, he continued, "It hurt. My pride hurt," he added, "—but I'm over it. Plus," Ruka chuckled, a bit humorless, "—you asked me if I was okay with it and I told you I was. I don't know why I took it so badly when you finally made the move…"

_Yes you did_, the voice in his head admonished cheekily. _You took it badly because you honestly thought he'd continue dancing around the subject, just like you'd always had. Well too bad Ruka, at least one of you isn't a coward._

Natsume shifted from beside him and Ruka urged himself to continue, "If there's one thing I'm sorrier about other than avoiding you like the plague," at this, Natsume snorted a laugh, "—it's that I made you wait." He bit his lip and chanced a look over to his best friend, catching sight of a neutral expression on his face. "You know, our Thursdays."

"Our Thursdays," Natsume replied easily after a pause, sitting up and resting one hand on his folded knee. "—it sounds sappy when you put it that way."

Unbidden, Ruka let loose a guffaw that seemed foreign to his own ears. When was the last time he'd laughed like that? He shook his head and smirked his agreement.

"Ruka, best friends fight," Natsume drawled, grunting as he lay down once again on the rooftop. "We're human. It's normal."

"Except I was the only one fighting," Ruka grumbled, slightly put out by Natsume's reaction. "Aren't you even the teeniest bit mad at me? It'd be so much easier to ease the guilt if you just yelled at me, used your Alice or gave me a good kick in the head, you know."

"Don't wish for that too soon, Ruka." Natsume grinned briefly, "It'll happen sooner or later." He shrugged a familiar drawl to his voice when he finished, "Just not over something like this."

"Are we cool?"

He hated how tentative his voice sounded at the moment but Natsume took no notice. If he had, he didn't judge. Instead, Natsume darted him a glance and a smirk that managed to ease his conscience just the slightest.

"Of course," Natsume answered gruffly, digging a playful elbow into Ruka's ribs. "I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true."

Punching Natsume on the shoulder, Ruka sighed, feeling a hefty weight lift from his shoulders. He settled into the warm burrow he'd created after years of use and a comfortable moment passed before Natsume interrupted the silence with a nonchalant, "I heard you've got this thing for Imai."

Ruka bolted into a sitting position and sputtered, already feeling the heated flush that crept into his cheeks, "Where did you hear something as stupid as that!?"

Natsume smirked at him before turning his eyes back to the sky, "Other than the fact I've seen you with Imai while she's not taking pictures of you," Natsume started, "—there's Koko."

_Koko!_

Ruka's head snapped to the window behind him and he'd honestly thought of pounding on the boy's Single Star window before he heard Natsume chuckle. Instantly, he softened.

"Oh, so you find this funny, huh?" Ruka griped tersely, folding his arms loosely around his kneecaps. "I don't have a _thing _for Imai. I've just," Ruka shrugged in a vain attempt to seem nonchalant, "—there are things about Hotaru Imai that perplex me, that's all."

"Perplex you, huh?" Ruka heard the teasing edge to his voice. "That sounds stupid."

"It can sound whatever way it likes but it's the truth," Ruka sniffed, feeling the heat flow into his cheeks. Damn, he hoped his voice wouldn't give him away because he'd never hear the end of it. He didn't like Hotaru Imai. He just didn't.

Or maybe, he just _couldn't._

It was just… far too _weird_. How could he like a girl that had persistently and _publicly _humiliated him ever since she'd come to the Academy? How could he like someone that seemed so emotionally-challenged and even abused her best friend daily just for the hell of it?

He couldn't.

Hotaru was callous and sarcastic and unrelentingly persistent. She was all splinters and dark traps. She was a Sudoku puzzle that just didn't want to be solved. She was fragile glass, she was a relentless storm. She was so damn cold-hearted.

_Hotaru Imai…_

Ruka shook his head and sighed. Was she really though? That question had plagued his mind for a good _week_ after their encounter in the library and Ruka had never thought that he'd be thinking about Imai for such a long period of time without recess.

He'd always thought that he'd have to tiptoe around the inventor. He'd always thought that he'd have to watch what he said, what he did and what he thought around her in hopes that she wouldn't break loose from her cool disposition and do her worse. Worse than her hits with her tenacious inventions, her camera's harassment and the stingy comments of truths that he'd never wanted to hear.

But by God, if only he hadn't heard her laugh like she had in the library, he could keep on believing that. Ruka wished he could've continued believing that she was a cold, dark girl that lived to make a hell out of his life. He wished he could've held tightly onto that image of her, the picture of the all-empowering Hotaru Imai whose personality had been created by God at his worst.

_But her laugh…_

There'd been something about it. Something that shook his body to the core, that seemed to melt away all of the coldness from Imai's existence in his mind and Ruka honestly didn't know what to make of it. What to make of the light laughter he'd never imagined the youngest Imai to have and the look of mirth in her eyes.

Vaguely, Ruka wondered what right she had to laugh like that and throw him off so badly but as soon as it had come, Ruka shook it off and laughed.

"You're thinking about her," Natsume's voice interrupted his thoughts.

Ruka stiffened and sputtered to try to ask him how he knew but before he could, Natsume answered, "You were sitting there with a stupid look on your face for five minutes," his voice was bland. "Then you started to laugh."

Natsume sat up, his features cool and relaxed before he looked over at him with guards down and a friendly lilt to his sharp eyes, "I bet she knows."

"Knows what?" Ruka asked, suddenly suspicious.

"That you like her."

"I don't like her," Ruka rolled his eyes, glancing below at the school grounds covered in dark shadows and faint silhouettes. "And she can't possibly know I like her if I don't know it myself."

Silence fell upon them both as cool winds blew past their warm bodies. Ruka shivered slightly and wrapped a loose arm around his legs before he felt Natsume's Alice flare from his right. In surprise, Ruka looked over at Natsume's cool expression still fixed upon the starlit sky, seemingly unknowing that he'd activated his Alice.

Just looking at him made Ruka feel jealous. It wasn't a rare phenomenon but being Natsume's best friend really didn't give him leave for random bouts of jealousy. Ruka had always been jealous of Natsume's complete reign over his emotions, his ability to think in tight situations and his compassion and stamina. He'd always been jealous that Natsume seemed to have a lid on all of his problems, been jealous that Natsume seemed three steps ahead in all situations and could easily diffuse arguments with a slow drawl or calm command.

Honestly, Ruka didn't know what the hell Natsume saw in him to have chosen this weak slip of a boy to be his best friend. Next to Natsume's powerfully calm form, Ruka felt like a worthless peon.

"Imai has an annoying way of knowing things before everyone else."

"What?" Ruka asked surprised.

"Imai," Natsume turned his head, crimson eyes aglow. "She knows everything."

"_Oh,_ _I have an idea…"_ The words floated back into his mind.

The certainty in Natsume's voice made Ruka shiver once more and for an unknown reason, Ruka felt something bitter coat his tongue. "What do you mean?" A dark moment of silence passed. Ruka blinked and looked harder at Natsume when he caught his obvious hesitation. A grunt of frustration escaped his lips. "She knew about her before I did."

"About Mikan?" Ruka blurted out.

With an awkward shrug, Natsume nodded. He lifted a hand lazily and, with a dance of his fingers, made tiny pinpricks of fire jump around in front of their eyes. "As much as I hate to admit it," Natsume grumbled with a twirl of his fingers, "Imai is a force to be reckoned with."

He opened his mouth to continue before he snapped it closed and sighed, sending a bored glance behind him. "Koko, shut your window," he called lowly, sending his fireballs in the direction of Koko's window.

With a small '_eep!', _there was a light slam, a faint click and a stumble within the room behind them.

Ruka couldn't help but chuckle and he glimpsed Natsume's grin in return.

"You're tired." The accusation left Ruka's lips before he could stop it.

"So are you." Natsume rolled his eyes and raised a brow. He leaned back, his palms flat against the rooftop before murmuring, "I had a mission after school."

Shocked, Ruka's body stiffened. "You had a mission after _school_ and managed to finish it that fast?!" Ruka glanced over Natsume's body briefly and breathed a sigh of relief when he glimpsed Natsume's relaxed form.

"I'm fine, Ruka," Natsume drawled blandly, smirking. "Besides, I make it a point not to miss this place too much." A boyish grin appeared on his lips and Ruka playfully punched him in the arm.

"Who's the sap now?" Ruka chuckled.

Natsume's Alice cooled and he sat silently, looking up at the sky. In the silence, Ruka wondered if he'd said anything that had ruined the mood and furrowed his brow to remember what he'd just said.

"There are a lot of good things I'd be missing. Besides—" An unexpected yawn interrupted whatever Natsume had been meaning to say and Ruka laughed, shoving Natsume in the arm.

"Go to sleep, Natsume. I'd rather not have to carry you to your room when you pass out," he joked.

"Shut up," Natsume glared, standing up. He looked to want to retort but seemed too tired to bother. Stretching his hands up, Ruka glimpsed the gleaming white bandage on his torso in surprise.

"Natsume, your stomach…"

Stiffening, Natsume dropped his arms and ran a hand absently over the area the bandage lie. Shrugging, he ran a hand through his hair. "It's fine."

"You got injured on the mission, didn't you?" Ruka accused. "You didn't do that yourself again, I hope. You should get it checked by Imai before you find out it's infected with poison like the last time—"

"Polka did it." Natsume turned his head away to hide the faint flush off of his cheeks. "It's fine like this."

_Mikan saw him without a shirt on…_

The thought, normally, would've made jealousy start itching to the surface but to Ruka's surprise, a laugh erupted up his throat. Natsume too seemed surprised, if his speechlessness was anything to go by. Ruka tried to explain but burst out into another fit of laughter, sputtering, "You…! You're b-blushing!"

Natsume snorted, slapping Ruka on the side of his head in response. "Idiot," he scowled which only made him laugh harder. Hiding his grin, Ruka told him to go to bed once more before laying on his back, watching as Natsume's figure disappeared from view.

He felt light, even though his body shivered without Natsume's warmth and he turned the conversation over in his mind, wondering how long he'd gone without this. How much had he missed without talking to Natsume? Honestly, Natsume was far too lenient on him, even if he was Natsume's best friend.

Ruka didn't know how long he stayed outside in the cold or how cold it had managed to get before he managed to drag himself back to his room. His mind had ceased to realize the temperature and by the time he lay on his bed, the sky had started lightening with ever faint shards of purples and pinks in the sky.

And before he closed his eyes, his mind far fuzzier than he would've liked, Ruka realized that he'd never felt so light in months.

* * *

His head was pounding agonizingly hard and it felt as though his whole skull were vibrating with the incessant fibrillations of his brain. He was tired, he was hot and damn it all, Ruka didn't feel good at all.

He didn't know where the hell he was going but he was pretty certain he was supposed to be heading to class. However, the way his vision was swimming, the task was far more difficult than it usually was. Why were there so many beiges and greens in the hallway?

His stomach lurched and Ruka slumped against the wall, letting his body slide until his back and head leaned against the cool, hard structure of the hallways. God was he glad that nobody woke as early as he did…

"What are you doing, Nogi?"

_Except her… _

Ruka groaned and turned his head in the direction where Imai was _supposed _to be standing. Instead, he saw four blurry, black pillars and something nauseatingly yellow. She seemed to be bathed in sunlight, so bright…

"Imai…" he laughed lowly, "—you're _glowing_."

"God Nogi, you're going to make me vomit," was her terse reply. His head was so _light_! He could swear Hotaru was dancing at the moment. The black pillars kept swaying…

"I never figured you for a dancer, Hotaru…"

Ruka felt sick. He voiced this out to Hotaru who scoffed. "I wonder what gave you away." There was a shuffle and a dark, painful pounding in his ears before he heard her light call of 'Idiot'. "Nogi, what the hell did you do to yourself?"

He couldn't think straight, that much was for sure. Focusing on any one thing made his head spin and Ruka found out immediately that he didn't want _that _to happen. He felt something cool, so agonizingly _good _touch his forehead for a moment, then his cheeks and he couldn't help the shiver that ran down his spine. Hotaru was touching him! Ruka never thought she'd feel so cool, so deliciously… he shivered with unsuppressed delight. It felt so good!

As if on reflex, Hotaru pulled away and Ruka couldn't contain the groan of displeasure from escaping his lips.

"What are you doing, Hotaru? Come back…" The back of his eyes were throbbing behind closed lids and Ruka chuckled aloud for no apparent reason. He just… Hotaru was so _funny_.

"Nogi, you're so stupid," he heard Hotaru hiss after more shifting and shuffles. "Keep that expression on your face for a while."

He laughed, "What are you talking about Hotaru? Aha! Hotaru… I never knew," he laughed again, "—your name. I called you Hotaru! Your name… so pretty…"

Vaguely, Ruka heard her scoff and say, "Amanatsu, lift that idiot onto the scooter. I'll be in my lab."

He felt light and so _happy_.

He could hear Natsume's voice and Hotaru's too.

Ruka laughed, "Hey, hey. Natsume… Hotaru, she likes to dance…!"

There were these real funny black things coming toward him… ushering him toward the darkness and he just… he couldn't resist! Before they claimed him completely, Ruka heard, "What the hell did you do to him?"

_Oh, Natsume_…_ he was just too funny_…

* * *

**Author's Note:**

_I'm sorry for being a horrible person and not updating this for a more than a __month. It's not you, it's me. Really. :) Happy Reading and thank you so much for the reviews! Especially to those that read my story and started their own RukaHotaru stories, I love that you were inspired. :)_

_Yeah, Ruka's pretty much a loser and I know you guys want your lovely RukaHotaru moments but this chapter was mainly bent on focusing on the development of Natsume and Ruka's friendship, since I made it so that they weren't on very good terms at the beginning of the story. I wanted to show Natsume's consistency, the depth of their friendship and how things worked between the two of them. I hope it translated since I'm not in my right mind right now_… _school's been pretty nasty_…

BUT_ you'll get your RukaHotaru in the last two chapters. I think this can be promised, at the least. Two more chapters, you guys! I'll definitely get this finished before summer begins!_

_Special thanks to Abnormality Words for his suggestions and critique. I loved it!  
_

* * *

_My Hopeless Romantic_


	4. The Sight of Destruction

**_Disclaimer:_** No matter how hard I wish - so hard I can't define - I know that it'd be foolish, to own what isn't mine. :)  
_**Dedication:**_ _crimsoneyes44

* * *

_

**  
Cryptic Signals**

Senses were meant to be sent into _overdrive_.

-_My Hopeless Romantic-_

Chapter 4. The _Sight _of Destruction

* * *

Ruka didn't have the faintest idea why he felt so amazingly refreshed but he was far too pleased to open his eyes or… get off something that was _extremely _hard on his back. It probably had something to do with the fact that he and Natsume were finally getting back on track after his irrational leave when Mikan and Natsume had gotten together but Ruka didn't care. He felt _good – _no! He felt great! It was no wonder he missed the feeling of actually being _happy_ for once.

He'd forgotten what it'd felt like to have the world rotate the _right_ way after spinning out of control for the last few months. Sighing, Ruka rolled over on his side and was infinitely aware of hard flooring. _Very _hard flooring. Should he open his eyes and dispel the magical feeling he'd been reunited with? Or should he succumb to the maddening curiosity that seemed to itch at his being? He was pretty certain that if he had happened to roll off the bed and onto the ground, the three feet of being airborne and the impact on the ground would've roused him awake…

A voice, bored but slightly amused and all too familiar took the choice out of his hands.

"Has anybody ever told you that you sleep like a girl?"

Ruka jolted up, immediately regretting the rough action when the fierce jump of pain burst behind his eyelids, causing tears to swim in front of his eyes. He cursed, rubbing his back in slow circles, blinking away the sleep from his eyes. When he'd managed to pull himself together, Ruka darted a look around the room to locate the inventor whose expression seemed to be far too amused than the situation called for.

"Imai, what are you—"

"Doing in my own room?" Hotaru finished in a drawl, putting down her screwdriver and turning around in her seat. Emotionless violet eyes pinned him to the floor and Ruka shrunk back, taken back by the coldness in her eyes and the unnerving gaze that she directed at him. She grabbed the water bottle on her desk and took a quick swig before raising a brow at his still speechless form. "Lost, Nogi?"

Ruka flushed, immediately scrabbling to his feet before realizing with full blown shock that not only was he still in pajama bottoms (his embarrassing blue ones with the yellow ducks on each butt cheek), but he was mismatched with the Academy uniform top on and only wearing one shoe…

"Imai… wha-what happened?!" He looked around frantically, taking in the colorless room filled with random inventions lining the walls, the number of workbenches that took up one side of the room and the bareness of the whole place. "Why am I in your room? Why was I _sleeping _in your room?!" He seemed at a loss for words once more, eyes still taking in the room in shock before his gaze settled on the black-haired girl. "Better yet, why would you _let _me sleep in your room with _this _on?" He gestured to his clothes wildly.

Hotaru snorted disdainfully, eyes drifting at his clothes with a smirk before shrugging. "Isn't that the million dollar question?" She drawled carefully, standing up to give him another once over. "You honestly don't remember, do you?"

"Would I be asking you if I knew already?" he griped impatiently, itching to get out of there. "And to add to the list of questions, what time is it?"

Hotaru raised a brow, slightly incredulous. "Nogi, are you demanding me?"

A chill ran up Ruka's spine and he stiffened, scowling. "I think I have a right to ask what I'm doing in your lab, Imai," Ruka returned, unamused.

"Huh," Hotaru smirked, hands clasped in her lap, her legs folded serenely. "I'm surprised you're not calling me '_Hotaru' _as you did this morning…"

Ruka sputtered, agitation quickly giving way for nervousness as it always had where Hotaru was involved. Why didn't he _remember_ anything?

"Really, Nogi," Hotaru chided coldly, a slight edge to her voice. "Think."

Ruka frowned, furrowing his brow trying to figure out _how the heck _he'd gotten to this state. Hotaru Imai was a crazy maniac, yes – but she'd never go so far as to come into his room and dress him this way without him waking up—Ruka inwardly flushed and beat himself over the head.

God, where the hell had he gotten _that_ thought?

He eyed her suspiciously, wracking his mind as she stood up and walked languidly toward him. Needless to say, this didn't help his thought process in the slightest. He remembered meeting Natsume on the roof. He remembered sorting things out and talking to Natsume about Mikan and Hotaru, too.

… _Hotaru…_

Natsume had agreed that Hotaru Imai was a force to be reckoned with and if this was coming from the infamous _Black Cat, _then what had he gotten himself into?!

Ruka blinked, surprised to find her just an inch in front of his very eyes, large amethyst eyes, straight nose, smooth skin over rounded, slightly prominent cheekbones and pale pink lips all in his direct view. On instinct, he stepped back and jumped when his back hit solid wall.

"I-Imai, what …"

A cool smirk fell across her lips and Ruka's cheeks flushed. "Nogi, maybe this will jog your memory…"

And there was a picture of him, blonde hair in wild disarray, cheeks flushed in a disgustingly bold shade of pink and eyes closed, lips parted in a laugh, sitting against the wall in blue pajamas and his Academy shirt, one shoe on his left foot.

_What the hell?!_

"When did you take this?!" Ruka looked nauseated, pointing a shaking finger at the picture. "Better yet, _why _did you take this?"

"Do you honestly have to ask me that last question?" Hotaru drawled blandly, pulling out another wad of pictures from her pocket. She passed the pictures to him and folded her arms with triumph, most likely from the look of utter disbelief on his face as he riffled through the stack of pictures in his hand. Smirking, Hotaru drawled, "As for when, I took those early this morning when you passed out in the hallway."

"Passed out in the hallway?" Ruka laughed. "What are you talking about?"

Hotaru raised a brow and sighed, picking invisible lint off of her sleeve. "Enough talk. Perhaps," she lifted her gaze, a dangerous lift to her lips, "—you'd prefer a little video I managed to put together."

Without waiting for a response, Hotaru turned on her heel and picked up one of the many remotes on her desk, twirling it around her finger with a smirk before pressing one of the buttons. Ruka watched, horrified, as a large flat screen descended from an opening in the roof and flickered with life.

Soon, he was pretty sure he'd die of mortification when he saw his flushed, giggling form leaning against the wall of the hallway. He wondered briefly how the heck _she _was in the video but there she was with an amused look on her face, bending down to scowl at him.

"_Imai…you're glowing!"_ Ruka flushed, disbelieving. What the heck possessed him to say _that _of all things!? Oh God, he was never going to live this down, he knew it. He wouldn't be surprised if this video was plastered all over the internet by now.

"_God Nogi, you're going to make me vomit."_

Make _her _vomit? This video was going to make _him _vomit!

"_I never figured you for a dancer, Hotaru…"_

What the _hell_.

"—_hat gave you away. Idiot… Nogi, what the hell did you do to yourself?"_

He was giggling and swaying from side to side and oh, it was horrible. He could feel himself flushing with mortification but he didn't dare tear his eyes away from the screen. The embarrassment and humiliation he'd ever felt in his whole life would never measure up to how he felt at the moment.

And she was touching him, fluttering her hands over his face to see the extent of his fever (at least, that's what he'd concluded) and to his surprise, the Ruka in the video seemed damn well pleased to feel her touching him. What the hell was _wrong_ with him?

"I'm delusional," he muttered softly, glancing at Hotaru from the corner of his eyes. She was smirking at the video, her arms folded in a way that had the remote still pointed at the screen. "I would never … Imai, you—this can't—"

"Shut up," she interrupted, pointing at the video, "—and watch."

"_What are you doing, Hotaru? Come back…"_ He watched himself reach for her as she pulled away and glanced at Hotaru. She looked amused about the whole situation but… in the video… why did she look so—Ruka couldn't explain. He wouldn't dare think that she looked concerned for him, because there was the turn in her eyes that showed her amusement but… why did she look so affectionate?

Ruka snorted, batting the thought away. _Yeah, right._

"_Keep that expression on your face for a while."_

She was taking pictures of him! God dammit, she was…!

He whirled around to face her, body shaking with emotion. "You…" he shook his head. "I'm lying sprawled on the ground, _delusional_ and all you can think of doing is take _pictures_ of me?! By God, Hotaru—what the hell are you!? Surely you couldn't be human because a decent huma—"

"—_your name. I called you Hotaru! Your name… so pretty…"_

Ruka restrained the dark flush of embarrassment away from the tips of his ears and tried to ignore the continuous giggles and mindless babble that came out of video-Ruka's mouth. Squaring his shoulders, Ruka continued, "—n being would do what's right and I don't know? Call for help?" he ranted sarcastically, throwing up his hands and groaning in frustration at her look of indifference. "That's low, Hotaru. Even for you!"

With a sharp jerk of her wrist, the screen blackened and recoiled back into the ceiling and Ruka didn't notice he was heaving breaths of indignation until the silence hit him full throttle.

He didn't care.

Who was this girl to be able to take him at his lowest and think of degrading him when he couldn't even fight back? Who was she to think that she had the right to keep blackmailing him like this for money of all things?! They'd known each other for five years, been classmates for five years and she'd been nothing but a cold-blooded girl who reveled in making him look like a freak of nature in front of the whole school. All of it was done so that she could gain money that she didn't even deserve! All of it was done because she was the 'Ice Queen' because she was 'all powerful' and because she was 'a force to be reckoned with' but god dammit, Ruka was sick of it all!

Ruka hadn't even noticed he'd been spouting his thoughts aloud to her until she leaned against her desk and replied icily, "Are you done?"

He was embarrassed, to say the least. He'd never been this direct to anybody but Natsume and even then, Natsume had never done anything to anger him to this extent. Something about Hotaru irked him, made him so mad sometimes that he couldn't hold in the urge to yell at her, to put her in her place, to kick her ego down a notch but all of it… all it ever did was make him lose self-esteem, make him shrink into himself and apologize for his forwardness and all she did? All Hotaru ever did was take it all in stride and patronize him even more.

So he turned blue eyes coolly to look into hers and bit out, "No, I'm not." Without giving himself any time to put his thoughts together, Ruka did what he was good at: letting his emotions reign. "Hotaru Imai, you're cold and ruthless," he bit out. "You're selfish and unkind. You're greedy and only sate your lust by demeaning everything around you. You used to be okay, especially when we were ten and you showed a semblance of having a heart so I looked past all of your little blackmailing deeds and listened to you when you spoke because I feel stupid now to say that I actually respected you."

Ruka laughed bitterly, looking over her icy pale features and finally into shards of velvet eyes. "I forgave you for all of it. I even laughed at it with you sometimes and admired your confidence and your who-the-hell-cares attitude when you did what you wanted and refused to back down but this," Ruka breathed harshly, gesturing to where the screen had appeared, "—that was going too far. That was the last straw. You've done some pretty rotten stuff before but this," Ruka shook his head and tasted a familiar taste of bitterness in his mouth. "I've had enough. Don't you ever think about how things will affect others instead of just thinking about yourself? You're the one being called the genius, the one that calculates and thinks everything through so now I wonder," Ruka said in a low voice, "What the hell you've done to make everyone so delusional because if they see you the way I see you now, they'd be thinking a hell of a lot different."

He was shaking hard and he willed his body to _stop_, just stop giving way to weakness. He'd never be able to do this again. He wasn't like Natsume, he wasn't strong. Ruka wished more than anything that at that moment, he'd be able to just take a page from Natsume and be able to put a lid on all of his emotions in tight situations like this. Be able to find and release it later in a way that he burnt and scorched and hit and hurt anything_ just anything_ that he could.

But he knew, once again, that he could never be like Natsume. He could never destroy with his Alice. Ruka never found release. He was the type who got angry, stuffed it all in a closet and briefly forgot about it until he had to stuff more and more into the closet and… Ruka hissed another breath… this was the result of when that closet got far too full.

He just exploded, taking everything along with it.

With one last withering look, he turned on his heel and headed to the door, anger fizzling with life. He'd said everything, was there honestly anything more to say?

"You're not going anywhere, Nogi," her voice was all sharp glass and bone-chilling thorns.

"Oh?" Ruka turned slightly, eyeing her with cool blue eyes, "And why the hell not?"

Hotaru shifted and Ruka looked at her, taking in the dark eyes that revealed nothing of her thoughts, the soft turn of her cheekbones, the slide of her nose and the thin line of her lips that showed how honestly unaffected she was after his outburst. Her eyebrows were stiff and her jaw was relaxed and when he stepped back and folded his arms, Ruka wondered how on Earth he'd managed to believe once upon a time that he'd be able to like a girl—no, not a girl. That'd be admitting he thought she was human. No, he couldn't believe he thought there was the thinnest slip of humanity in the block of ice that stood in front of him.

"What?" he snapped coolly when she refused to answer. "Cat got your tongue?"

Ruka didn't know why but he felt oddly pleased when he saw her jaw clench.

Hotaru straightened, pushing off of the desk she'd been leaning on. She deposited the remote on her desk languidly, taking her time but Ruka knew this discussion wasn't finished, knew that she expected him to wait, expected him to wait for her to get in one last word, one last defining statement to declare her the victor of their argument, even after his tirade.

But Ruka honestly _didn't care_.

She could win like she always had. She could take it all and call herself the victor. She could walk around the school with a smug smile on her face for the rest of her life and Ruka wouldn't have cared any less. If he cared, he would've walked out the door without her answer so that he'd have the last word, so that he'd be the winner for once.

But he didn't.

Because Ruka was going to give her one chance, one last chance to redeem herself. One last chance for Hotaru to negate everything he'd said, to show him that he was wrong because for once, Ruka wished that he was wrong. He honestly wished that she'd care enough to want him to understand that all of his thoughts were wrong.

He didn't know why. His words had seemed to already decide that they'd given up on her but he didn't want to. Not yet, anyway. Because as much as he hated to admit it, he still couldn't believe that a girl that laughed like she had, that a girl that could smell like she had and that could look like she had in the video, could possibly not care that he was finally throwing out the small friendship that they'd had.

He believed that. That they had a friendship, even if it revolved around blackmail and that he'd been in love with her best friend. But it couldn't just be that. It _couldn't _be. Because he'd cared, he knew. At the back of his mind, Ruka hoped that she cared enough about their friendship to want to save it.

So he blinked coolly, hiding all of his thoughts and all of his emotions behind the tiny little bottles in his mind enough to make even Natsume proud of his temporary ability. He hid as much as he could so that when he lifted his gaze, he'd be able to gaze at her, unblinkingly, until she decided what she wanted because Hotaru Imai had always seemed like a girl that knew what she wanted. So this line that he was throwing out to her, that had their friendship and their whole past at the other end, was in her hands.

Because Ruka had had enough. He wasn't going to fight for something that was never mutual in the first place. Ruka was done with being a masochist. Whatever she decided, he'd go along with that. He wasn't going to linger any longer.

"Well?" Ruka was proud at the bold confidence in his voice. "Why wouldn't I want to get out of here, Hotaru?"

Hotaru met his gaze and Ruka's heart thudded painfully against his chest. He restrained the urge to growl, to clutch at the area where his heart laid to ease the pain of expectance and breathed painfully past the dark organ that was stuck in his throat. Because his heart _was _stuck in his throat and Ruka banished the questioning thought in his mind wondering why it would be there in the first place.

He shouldn't care. He couldn't.

"Because Nogi – "

…_you have it all wrong…_

It was so easy to say, just say it, Ruka urged.

She took a step closer, and then stopped. Black hair swayed easily and she glanced around the room before letting her stare fall easily onto his. Ruka couldn't help but squirm expectantly.

"—you're still wearing pajamas."

Ruka closed his eyes and breathed, ignoring the way his heart had fallen to his feet. When he opened them, they were as blue as ever, now shards of ice. If possible, his voice was even colder than his eyes.

"Yeah? Once upon a time, I would've cared, Imai," Ruka muttered vaguely. Inwardly, he laughed at the hope that he'd had just moments before. He'd never learn, really. "But now, after all of this," he gestured at the space between them, "—after all of this, I could honestly care less."

She looked ready to say something but Ruka was done giving her chances.

"I don't think walking around with my embarrassing blue duck pajamas, a shoe and my uniform shirt could be any more embarrassing than the humiliation I feel after giving you all of these chances and hoping there's a shred of compassion in your body," he bit out darkly, "—and have you throw it in my face every time."

His hand was on the door knob when she called his name softly but Ruka shook his head without looking back. "From now on Imai," he breathed in his courage and muttered softly, "—just leave me alone."

He didn't know why he felt so tired after all of this. He didn't know why he didn't feel at least the tiniest bit triumphant about his first victory. Ruka was pretty sure Hotaru had been damn well ecstatic when she managed to pull one over on him, beat him with her sly words and her well-thought out plans.

What was wrong with him?

True to his words, Ruka didn't feel the least bit embarrassed to be seen walking around with his blue duck pajamas or the one shoe. Even the blatant staring didn't deter him. He just walked, wondering why he couldn't revel in his victory just once, this once. Why wasn't he satisfied?

In a blur, he was in bed, changed out of his horrid pajamas and into a pair that didn't make him feel like vomiting when he saw them.

Lying on his bed sheets, Ruka put a hand on his forehead and sighed, turning the conversation over and over again in his head. Things weren't supposed to end this way. He was supposed to feel light, feel relieved that he'd rid himself of Hotaru Imai once and for all.

He had nothing to feel guilty about, nothing to feel ashamed about.

He'd won, after all.

But he didn't feel like he'd won anything at all. Could it be that after everything, after all of the arguments and all of his last words, she'd still won?

Ruka didn't think twice about it. He didn't second guess. Natsume had said it himself, Hotaru Imai was a force to be reckoned with.

Ruka could've hit himself over the head for heeding the warning. If he'd just thought it over and kept his distance, maybe he could have spared himself the trouble of dealing with Hotaru Imai for all of these years.

But again, here he was, thinking about her, continually replaying how she had looked before he'd left. She'd been standing there, so small and powerful, her face all dark planes and solemn shadows and her expression, indifferent and uncaring as always.

And with a wry, bitter laugh, Ruka couldn't help but think that the sight of Hotaru Imai spelt his destruction the day he'd met her.

Really, he'd never learn.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Bet you didn't see that coming, huh? It sure didn't follow my original plans of having them meet at the Quad and slam into each other, the typical_ _"ran into love" if you will and have Ruka still confused and blah blah like some of you may have liked but this… I like this version better._

_I honestly had to have rewritten this chapter five times in order to have the last chapter the way I'd imagined it. I bet it wasn't the happily ever you wished they were going to get, huh?_

_Well the next chapter is the last and I hope you're stoked to read it. To be honest, I think I might be able to finish it this weekend but with my left arm still in a cast, we'll have to see. I have exams starting next week and provincials starting the week after. Eek! Wish me luck!_

_Thanks for reading!

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_

_  
My Hopeless Romantic_


	5. The Taste of Hotaru

_**Disclaimer:**_ I wonder how it'd feel, to have Gakuen Alice as my own, but since I don't want to steal, I'll have to settle for a loan. :) Wow, this is my poor attempt at another disclaimer-rhyme. Forgive my lameness.  
_**Dedication:**_ _crimsoneyes44 _because I kinda-sorta adore how you always back me up on my writing and how insanely proRukaHotaru you are. XD This story was most definitely written for you, subconsciously. Told you this would be out in two days. :)

* * *

**  
Cryptic Signals**

Senses were meant to be sent into _overdrive_.

-_My Hopeless Romantic-_

Chapter 5. The _Taste_ of Hotaru

* * *

Ruka hated all of the whispers and stares.

If anything, Ruka prayed that everyone's attention would just return to Mikan and Natsume, or maybe Wakako and Kitsuneme now that they'd gotten together, instead of continually giving him the sad eye or the sympathetic glance once again.

Hadn't they gotten enough of looking at him after Mikan and Natsume had gotten together?! Granted, the glances of sympathy were no longer because he was stuck in an unrequited love with his best friend's girlfriend – oh no.

They were looking at him this way because Hotaru Imai was out for blood.

Ruka shrunk lower in his seat as the doors to the classroom were thrown open and Hotaru walked in, cool velvet eyes as bland as always and footsteps like a woman set out on a mission. The chatter, which had swelled when Ruka had walked into the room with Natsume, dimmed appropriately but that didn't seem to deter the inventor. As usual, she walked into the room like she owned it and Ruka clenched his jaw with annoyance.

He honestly had to stop being frustrated about how unaffected she was.

It had been two weeks, after all.

_Two!_

He had to get _over_ it. He was supposed to be done with her, not looking at her every move whenever she was in the room and not glaring at the back of her head whenever she did something as she normally would. It wasn't her fault he couldn't seem to drop the subject and it wasn't her fault he couldn't be as unaffected by the whole thing as she was. And as bitter as it made him feel to say it, Ruka hated the fact that he couldn't stop replaying the whole argument again in his mind and having the feeling that he was missing something distinctly important in the way the situation had panned out. There had been so much anger and tension and—screw it if he knew. But damn, if he could get her out of his mind because he'd tried. The Lord knew how hard Ruka had tried to rid Hotaru Imai from his thoughts but no matter what he did and no matter the time of day, something about her and the way things had ended between them didn't sit right.

And he knew he really had to stop looking at her but…

_She'd clipped up her bangs today._

"Ruka."

Ruka automatically snapped his gaze away from Hotaru and turned his eyes to the window in time to hear Natsume's low snort of amusement.

"_Natsume,"_ Ruka hissed, his cheeks immediately heating up at the smirk on his friend's face. "I'm glad you seem to find my current situation amusing," he continued dryly, willing the dark blush away from his cheeks, "—but you're attracting attention."

"You're the one blushing."

The words seemed to trigger a white, hot anger that welled in his stomach. It seemed strange, irrational even, but the idea of Natsume pointing out his inability to get Imai off his mind rubbed Ruka the wrong way. Running a hand through his hair, Ruka glanced in her direction and blinked rapidly when Hoshio Hoshino leaned perilously close on her desk, a charming smile on his face. Ruka's foul mood intensified dramatically before he couldn't stand sitting with her across the room any longer. Glaring, Ruka breathed darkly, "Don't follow, Natsume."

He'd soon regret his abrupt actions later but at the moment, he didn't care that he'd reacted like Natsume by knocking his seat over and storming toward the door. Ruka didn't care that the whole class was bound to be gazing intently at his back, watching as if he was some sort of freak display on exhibition. And Ruka could honestly care less about the whispers that immediately shook the doors.

He hated the way the idea immediately flashed through his thoughts, but the only thing he actually seemed to be annoyed about was the fact that among those so interested in the room he'd left behind was a girl that couldn't have cared less about him.

A vivid image of piercing velvet eyes blinked in front of him and Ruka almost tripped over his feet before blinking rapidly.

The empty hallway stared back at him.

He snorted bitterly. _Hotaru? Chasing after him? _

Ruka honestly couldn't fathom how he'd believed she would ever think of going after him. It was Hotaru Imai after all. Hotaru Imai didn't do such things. It wasn't much of a surprise that she was driving him crazy, either.

Another bitter laugh escaped him.

She'd always been able to scar him far deeper than any other.

Ruka gritted his teeth and let out a loud breath of anger, before tucking his hands moodily into the pockets of his shorts and heading down the corridor. He didn't even blink as the school bells rang heavily in the air around him and the thought of going back to class couldn't have seemed any less revolting. Natsume skipped all the time when he wasn't up to class, Ruka thought vaguely, leaning against one of the hallway pillars. Skipping one himself shouldn't be a big deal.

Scattered footsteps and a feminine squeal of panic brought him out of his thoughts before Ruka managed to catch the figure of one, Mikan Sakura.

"Ah, Ruka-pyon!"

"Mikan," Ruka blinked in surprise as familiar large brown eyes stared at him in shock. Before he knew it, Ruka's eyes widened when brown eyes narrowed to slits and small arms that had been in his grasp shoved him in the chest until his back hit solid cement.

"_You!"_

Years from then, Ruka would still probably wonder how in the world little Mikan Sakura had managed to muster so much power into those small arms of hers. Despite his surprise, he blinked up, dazed from his position sprawled on the ground at the brunette who seemed to be sizzling with a fiery anger he'd never seen directed at him before.

"Just who do you think you are, Ruka-pyon?" she folded her arms, scowling at him menacingly from above.

"Uhh."

"How dare you do something so horrible as to make Hotaru _this_ sad!?"

For the third time in the frame of thirty seconds, Ruka found himself blinking in surprise. "_Hotaru? Sad?_" A scoff left his lips before Ruka rolled his eyes. "Hotaru is _not _sad and if anything, Hotaru is the predator in our situation. I'm taking it she didn't tell you the whole story."

"Of course she didn't," Mikan snapped, stomping one foot and pursing her lips. "Hotaru never tells me when she's upset. She bottles it in and works and works and works herself _mad _in her lab."

"If she didn't tell you, then how do you know this is my fault?" Ruka couldn't help but ask, folding his knees and leaning his back against the pillar. He draped an arm around his folded knee casually, glaring at the wall before him. "I'm not the one who threw our meager friendship down the toilet as if it were used toilet paper."

Ruka looked up at her snort and watched as she wrinkled her nose. "Can't you see that Hotaru is sad, Ruka-pyon? Can't you see how much she misses you?"

Ruka groaned and closed his eyes, remembering the frequent unaffected glances he'd caught her throwing his way and the way her eyes seemed to flash with anger before submitting to easy indifference. Ruka, against his will of course, had taken to observing Hotaru Imai in the days following their spat and he'd seen the ranges of her expressions going from haughtily bored to bland indifference. It didn't look like Hotaru was capable of expressing anything else other than variations of the two above.

"So no," Ruka relayed, clasping his hands together. "I honestly don't see it."

Displeasure stretched the length of Mikan's pretty face and Ruka made it a point to turn a blind eye to it.

"She hasn't hit me for two weeks."

He almost didn't hear the quiet whisper of her words but with the amount of dependence he had for his hearing and senses, Ruka managed to catch it and furrowed his brow. "What do you—"

Mikan threw her hands up. "She hasn't _hit _me for two weeks! Do you know what that _means_ Ruka-pyon?" Her voice had managed to raise an octave before she answered in a panicked whisper, "You've _replaced_ me!"

Her choked gasp almost made Ruka laugh but something rock hard seemed to be crammed in his throat. "You've got to be kidding." He shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger, hissing, "I haven't replaced you, Mikan. If you haven't noticed, Hotaru doesn't want anything to do with me and I'm afraid the feeling is mutual this time around." He let a laugh escape his lips. "You can _have_ her."

"Ruka."

He blinked at the formal use of his name, focusing clear blue eyes on the determined girl before him. She shifted slightly, biting her lip as if reluctant to continue the conversation. "Ruka… Hotaru, she …" Brown eyes glittered dangerously, making it even more difficult for him to swallow. "She's been letting me hug her."

A bark of laughter slipped from him before he could control it and he looked up at her in amusement, watching as she stomped her foot, frowning. "C'mon, Ruka-pyon! Believe me when I say there is something bugging Hotaru and it's your entire fault!"

"Shouldn't this be making you feel happy? That she's letting you hug her, I mean."

Ruka watched Mikan pause, looking up thoughtfully, clasping her hands behind her back and rocking on the balls of her feet. "Well, you know… knowing that Hotaru is upset enough to want to hug me makes me happy that she trusts me but—" she shrugged, a small smile on her lips, "—if the only reason Hotaru wants to hug me is because she's sad, I'd rather get rare hugs from her and have her happy." She fixed a stern expression on her face and placed her hands back on her hips. "So you'd better not mess up Ruka-pyon! You know how to fix this!"

"I would if I was the one at fault here," Ruka muttered low under his breath.

"Are you blaming Hotaru?"

Startled by the low, dark accusation, Ruka bit his lip and shrugged. "Why don't you be the judge of that?"

"Ruka-pyooon," Mikan moaned painfully, falling in a heap beside him after he relayed the events that had transpired in the inventor's lab. "How could you be so thoughtless?"

"How am _I _the one that's thoughtless?" Ruka sputtered. "She's the one that took advantage of me while I was sick for her insane sadistic pleasure," he pointed out, burrowing himself deeper into the wall. "So if you ask me, I have a right to be angry that she'd choose her blackmailing lifestyle over our friendship."

Mikan harrumphed, folding her arms in front of her chest before she set her piercing brown eyes back to his blue. "She took care of you while you were sick, Ruka-pyon."

"I woke up on the hardwood floor," Ruka returned dryly, running a lithe hand through his hair. Even as he said it though, his mind turned the image of her nursing him to back to good health and the thought made a laugh rumble through his chest and a blush blossom to his cheeks. "The least she could've done was give me the bed…"

"Oh Ruka-pyon," Mikan huffed playfully, knocking their shoulders together. "When it comes to Hotaru… you can't ask for 'what she could've done'. It should mean something that she did something for you in the first place." She cocked an eyebrow and put a finger to her lip in thought. "I would've thought that if anybody, Ruka-pyon would know that well."

Ruka frowned. "Why would—"

"You spend more time with Hotaru than I do sometimes," Mikan cut in lightly, leaning back on her palms. "Ruka-pyon knows that if Hotaru didn't care, she wouldn't have brought him to her room, right? She would've dropped you off at the infirmary if she didn't care."

She was smiling thoughtfully, tapping a foot on the ground with one of her black school shoes when a giggle slipped past her lips.

"What is it?"

"I was just thinking," she giggled once more, "—how Hotaru would look as she treated you. She's not heartless, you know. She's my very best friend."

Ruka fought back a retaliation that lay at the tip of his tongue before she started once more, "Plus, I think Hotaru might like you, Ruka-pyon. Like-like you." A wolfish grin appeared on her lips and her eyes glittered mischievously. "And I know you like her too."

Ruka's face heated up and he sputtered as a wide grin probed at her lips. "What… you can't be serious. I doubt—"

The bell rang and with a yelp of hysteria, Mikan bolted to her feet. "Oh no, I skipped class! Natsume is going to kiiiiiill me!"

Before he could question her any further, Mikan had hoisted her bag back on her shoulder and ran the way he'd just come with a wave. "Fighto, Ruka-pyon!"

And footsteps echoed in her wake.

Ruka chuckled humorlessly, shaking his head.

He still couldn't quite believe what Mikan had managed to divulge in terms of Hotaru's state. Was she honestly as sad as Mikan made her out to be? Judging by the indifferent expression permanently etched on her face, Ruka decided that it probably wasn't serious. Hotaru being sad over what they had fought over? He just couldn't see it, couldn't quite grasp the idea of Hotaru being so affected.

Then again, the idea of Hotaru actually admitting her wrongs didn't seem very Hotaru Imai, either.

A light chuckle escaped him.

_Oh, what a stubborn pair they made._

A faint ache in his chest started palpitating and Ruka clenched his fists, forcing his feet out of the school and into the light mid morning air.

It had been so easy to be unaffected by Hotaru's absence the first few days after their fight but Ruka wondered how in the world it started getting so unbearable. What started off as a normal school day bantering with Natsume and the gang turned out to be so incredibly…

He didn't know what to name it.

Lonely?

Was that the word? Ruka hated the way it sounded but the definition seemed to match perfectly with how he felt and it was just too pathetic to fathom. He shouldn't be affected by her at all. He shouldn't even need to think about the whole thing. Two weeks ago, he promised himself he'd start anew without Hotaru Imai. Without the constant bickering, the blackmail and the inane analysis she managed to do on his character every other hour they were in each other's presence.

God but he missed her.

Ruka had accepted the fact a mere two days ago but that didn't make him feel any less disgusted of himself. Disgusted of the fact that after all his big words and hearty exclamations and the inexcusable things that she'd done, he still managed to miss her, of all things. Why? _Why _did it have to be _her _of all people? Anybody but her would do but it _just _had to be her.

"You know, if you miss her that much, you should just go talk to her."

Ruka choked on his spit before whirling around to meet brown eyes filled with mirth. _"Koko,"_ he hissed darkly.

"Yo," he made a small wave, "Missed you in class, man."

With a low snarl, Ruka grabbed the boy's arm and pulled him over to the thick foliage of the Northern Forest. After slamming him none too gently against a tree, Ruka pinned him down with merciless blue eyes. Without bothering to beat around the bush, Ruka muttered, unyielding, "How much do you know?"

A boyish grin lit up Koko's face before he rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Did you mean about how much you want Imai to apologize to you or how much you miss her? Or even the fact that you were insanely jealous when Hoshino made the moves on Hotaru this morning?"

Ruka wanted to choke him to death.

Koko took a cautious step back, pressing himself into the tree with both of his hands up in surrender. "Hey hey _hey_! You're the one who asked! Would you rather I lie to you instead?" Koko whined in annoyance, "Because I can do that, too!"

"Koko, you…" Ruka shook his head and ran a flustered hand through his hair before huffing in annoyance. "Why can't you just mind your own business for once?"

Koko rolled his eyes as if in mild pain. "I can't help it when you're standing in my way with all of your thoughts practically hammering my brain!" Koko took a cautious step forward before swinging an arm around Ruka's shoulders amicably. "Listen, Ruka. I've been going out with Sumire for over _eight_ months now. _Eight_! Do you know how _frustrating _it can be when your girlfriend digs the drama?" Koko asked in a pained whisper. He tilted his head back and sighed, "But you have to suck it up. That's what I learned. If you think she's worth it, you suck it up and grovel. It'll be worth it in the end."

Koko nodded, a pleased grin on his face before he glanced Ruka in the face once more. "Trust me, man. I'm pro."

"You're pro at groveling?" Ruka snorted. "Why should I strive to be as whipped as you are? Now it's clear as to who wears the pants in _your_ relationship."

"Ha ha," Koko huffed dryly, taking his arm away from Ruka and leaning against a nearby tree. "At least I have a relationship to boast about. All I'm _saying,_" Koko stressed, backing off at Ruka's dark glare, "—is that you've been moping about this for _days_. Days! Wouldn't it make the both of you more at ease to just get over this pride-thing that you have and talk about it? Who cares about who starts off the conversation first if it ends with you two finally getting together?"

Ruka's expression was grim. "What do you mean, _finally_?"

"I'm talking about the sexual tension that's been _killing _me for the past—man, I don't even know how long!"

Ruka sputtered, his efforts to restrain himself from being swayed by yet another friend getting completely shot to hell. "Sexual tension? What sexual tension?"

"The sexual tension that oozes from your very pores," Koko returned gravely. "Listen to me, man. I've got experience. Eight months of _painstaking_ experience." He dropped both palms on Ruka's shoulders and looked him sternly in the eyes. "You've got to talk it over before the sexual tension gets too much. Ah ah! Don't even start," Koko cut in when Ruka looked about to retaliate. "Just listen. There _is _sexual tension and trust me because I know, if you decide to ignore the sexual tension, it's going to bite you in the ass."

"You're ridiculous," Ruka scoffed, flustered. "Absolutely ridiculous!"

"Your pride is ridiculous!"

Ruka glared darkly at the brunette and watched with mild satisfaction when Koko recoiled cautiously. In a low mutter, he shrugged, "Pride is the only thing I have left after Imai was finished with me. I'm not going to let her take the last thing I have."

Silence reigned and Koko coughed awkwardly.

Having just about enough of this, Ruka rubbed a hand through his hair and sighed. "I'm heading out. Thanks for trying to help, Koko," Ruka returned half-heartedly, "Cover for me. I'm skipping the rest of the day."

Tucking his hands back into his pockets, Ruka headed out of the forest, looking up at the May skies to predict the time before Koko's words made him still.

"I bet you're going to kiss her senseless by the end of the day."

"What on _earth_ are you—"

"The sexual tension," Koko repeated again. "The amount of sexual tension is _ridiculous_, I can't believe you don't even see it! And since you're so keen in not giving in first and God knows Imai won't, the next time you see her, by God you're going to snog her until she can't snog another man in her life."

By the time Ruka managed to clear the surprisingly vivid image that immediately floated to mind, the bastard was gone and Ruka's mind was shocked to the core.

His feet wandered aimlessly around school grounds, taking care not to walk to areas infested with students and teachers like Central Town and the recreational facilities of the school. Instead, by early afternoon, Ruka found himself standing in the barn with stray pieces of hay and wheat scattered across the barn floor.

Before his feet had even stepped into the barn, the animals had already started slowly congregating in a semi-circle around him, pushing their noses into the fabric of his shorts or rubbing their pelts against his legs. In all honesty, Ruka knew they were trying to make him feel better. Even the smallest insect could feel the distress in his movements.

Usagi, who'd taken refuge in the barn for the last few days, burrowed and played with another bunny, sending him a glance that snorted scornfully, _"Still? I like her too but she's not like us."_

"What's that supposed to mean?"

The dark whisper made all of the other animals still but Usagi's ears flattened, whether from annoyance or the fact that his master still seemed unhappy, Ruka couldn't tell. _"Ruka-sama is angry." _Usagi noted pointedly. _"It doesn't matter, she smells nice."_

Ruka snorted, rolling his eyes. "Yeah, well apparently everyone likes her."

An image of Hoshino making the moves on Hotaru begged his attention and Ruka snarled darkly before feeding the animals in the barn. His thoughts strayed occasionally, but again, his masochistic side reigned and managed to string his thoughts back to the subject of his distress.

Hotaru Imai.

"_I think Hotaru might like you, Ruka-pyon. Like-like you. And I know you like her too."_

To think he'd liked Mikan for _five _years and she'd never known about it even after he'd hinted almost shamelessly. How the hell had she managed to come to this conclusion? It was laughable! Of course, the idea of liking Hotaru hadn't been too hard to believe but Imai liking _him_? Oh man, he'd bring it up to the group in fifty years and damn, they'd laugh about it.

Sighing, Ruka left the barn with Usagi in tow until they made it to their regular patch of warm grass on the hill just adjacent to the barn. He lay on his back with one hand tucked beneath his head, the other lazily petting Usagi, who had taken to jumping onto his stomach and burrowing into his diaphragm.

"_If you think she's worth it, you suck it up and grovel. It'll be worth it in the end… If you decide to ignore the sexual tension, it's going to bite you in the ass."_

Honestly, all he needed was Natsume to put in his two cents and the day would end with everybody pushing him to grovel at Imai's feet. Then again, Natsume had made it a point not to dwell on the subject too much and when something came up, all he could manage to do was smirk and take utter amusement from the situation.

_What a friend_, Ruka thought dryly.

What'd they take him for? Everybody thought of him as the pushover within the group but in this, he would not back down. And if they all objected to it, it wouldn't matter. At least he had the animals on his side.

…

…

…

Ruka groaned as the significance of his last thought struck him. How pathetic _was _that? Oh God, he had to get over this and fast before he drove himself into the mental asylum for good.

With a startled twitch, Usagi dug his paws into Ruka's shirt before kicking off.

"Usagi, what are you—"

Ruka swallowed thickly, immediately sitting up to observe the intruder. "Imai," he ventured cautiously, nodding in recognition. "What brings you here?"

She didn't answer immediately and after taking one look at her face and consequently having it burn up like a red beacon, Ruka turned his gaze to glare daggers at his pet rabbit's back who had taken to purring intently into Hotaru's shoe.

_The damn traitor._

With a rustle, Hotaru took out a folded piece of paper from her pocket and extended her pale hand down to hand it to him.

_Meet me at the barn, please.  
Ruka_

He could see the 'please' had been crossed out two times before being written glaringly dark onto the white piece of paper. He recognized the writing, of course, and it sure wasn't _his._ Oh boy, Natsume Hyuuga was going to _get _it.

_Bastard._

Ruka could practically picture his best friend caving in at Mikan's watery brown eyes and enigmatic smile, the traitor. They were all traitors, he mused dryly. And now he was here with the girl of his nightmares with no preparation and nothing to say.

Damn, he was screwed.

He jumped slightly at the foreign sound of her voice, so familiar from the last time he heard it, melodious and calm.

"I know you didn't write it." Hotaru rolled her eyes at his startled expression and crossed her arms defensively. "You don't write like that."

"If you knew I didn't write it, why bother come?" Ruka asked after getting over his initial shock. He tried keeping his voice neutral but among other things, he couldn't completely control how utterly displeased he was for being caught off guard by her presence.

She shifted her feet, a cool wind immediately tackling her black hair into disarray before she tamed it with a brush of her hand. Amethyst eyes shimmered mysteriously, "I was curious."

Ruka wondered why he'd hoped she'd respond differently. "About what, may I ask? If you're curious about my well-being, I'm holding up just fine without your presence." He looked up to scrutinize her reaction and only managed to be struck by how she stood out against the barn and grassy scenery. Maybe this was what Usagi meant when he said she wasn't like them…

"I was curious as to whether or not you managed to grow up," Hotaru bit out with a roll of her eyes. "I suppose even I can be proven wrong."

"To think I actually thought you came to apologize," Ruka shook his head. "I should've known you wouldn't be able to swallow that enormous pride of yours."

"I have nothing to apologize for."

"You can't be _serious_." Ruka tilted his head back to regard the sky with exasperation before chuckling bitterly. "I hate to bring up the past but you… you—"

"I what?"

"You're heartless." He couldn't even look at her _face_. Ruka couldn't believe she had the nerve to say she had nothing to apologize for. "I had my whole spiel that day two weeks ago and I'd rather not repeat myself. You're ever the attentive listener. I'm sure you were able to catch every word."

"I'm heartless," Hotaru deadpanned after a pause. "If I'm heartless, you're a bastard."

"_I'm_ a bastard? I'm the bastard?" he repeated disbelieving. "How the hell does that even _work_? I'm not sure you noticed Hotaru but you took pictures of me while I was sick, left me on the floor and took a video of me making a complete fool of myself before rubbing my face with the fact. I could see where your nickname came from when I first met you but I never really believed it until you showed me that video." Ruka bit the inside of his cheek to hold in his anger and snapped, "You really are a heartless, blackmailing ice queen."

"That breaks my heart," Hotaru rolled her eyes. "It really does. Really Nogi, I've heard that one enough times for it not to cut anymore. If you're trying to hurt me, hit me somewhere deeper than that."

"Well gee, I'm sorry I don't try to dig up blackmailing information from everyone in my spare time so that I can, one day, use it to my advantage to hit my opponent where it hurts the most," Ruka returned sardonically, gripping the grass with a tight fist.

She frowned and Ruka didn't miss the way she turned her head just the slightest to what? Hide a slip of vulnerability? A laugh, perhaps?

"You never know when it comes in handy."

"Oh yeah, because you honestly have to blackmail me everyday, right? It's a life or death matter, after all."

His sarcasm wasn't lost to either of them.

Hotaru straightened, crossing her arms tight across her chest before glaring at him heatedly, "I don't need to justify myself to you."

"Of course you don't," Ruka scoffed. "You made it clear we weren't friends when you…" He growled with frustration. "You know what? I don't want to talk about this with you anymore."

"Then we don't have anything to talk about," she turned to leave. Before she took another step, Hotaru murmured bitingly, "I'm not going to beg. I'm not going to apologize. But I will say this: _You can't see the whole sky through a bamboo tube."_

It took Ruka but a minute to run the proverb through his head before he jumped to his feet with the familiar feeling of white hot anger broiling and churning in his stomach. With a jerk of his wrist, he caught her arm and turned her around, mildly surprised by the anger in her eyes.

"Are you saying I'm ignorant? Blind?" He threw up his hands and growled. "You never make any _sense_! Stop beating around the bush and stop sending me these cryptic messages because God knows I'm going to stew over it for the rest of my life and end up driving myself crazy over you."

Her lips twitched into the semblance of a smile before she snorted a laugh.

"What? What's so funny?"

Ruka colored when he realized what he'd just said and sputtered, "You know that's not what I meant. And again, this doesn't have anything to do with the matter at hand. Why'd you say that?"

She paused, her gaze was almost unnerving. Looking almost disgusted with herself, Hotaru forced out, "We can't be friends if you expect me to change."

"That isn't what the proverb means," Ruka pointed out. "And I'm not asking you to change at all. I'm asking you to be considerate for once and maybe, just maybe, make me feel like you actually value me as a friend."

Hotaru rolled her eyes, just as he knew she would. "I wouldn't bring you into my lab and take care of you if you weren't a friend." She shot him a mysterious look of… he didn't even know what to call it before pointing out, "Be grateful I gave you the floor. If it were anybody else aside from the idiot and you, they'd still be lying out in the hallway."

Ruka couldn't help but laugh. "So you're saying I'm your best friend? That you like me? Or both?"

He blushed, flabbergasted that he'd managed to force out the blunt questions but the embarrassment was well worth it when he saw the surprising twin pinpricks of pink dotting both cheeks. "Of course not," she snapped, sounding almost disgusted. "Really Nogi, it's a surprise that after all this time I've spent in your presence, you've still managed to prove to be an irreversible idiot."

"Only in front of you."

The blush deepened and with a dark glare of displeasure, Hotaru turned on her heels and stormed down the hill.

He didn't know why he did it.

Screw it.

If Ruka was actually being honest with himself, he damn well knew why.

She'd practically confessed, in her usual roundabout way. Of course it didn't negate the fact that she'd still done all of those horrible things, but just the thought of her saying, _"If it were anybody else but you"_ made Ruka irrationally pleased. Considering it was _Hotaru_ to boot, that must've done horrible things to her ego_… _especially since she'd said it in the hopes that he'd understand.

The thought made a grin erupt onto his lips. _  
_

It didn't matter though.

She was cold and ruthless, selfish and unkind, greedy and demeaning.

Or at least, that's what he'd thought before.

But could a cold and ruthless girl blush the way she had or feel the teeniest bit embarrassed by a roundabout confession? Could a selfish and thoughtless girl manage to treat him when he was sick, no matter the conditions? The more Ruka thought about it, she must've done a good job in treating him if he'd managed to gain coherency in less than 15 hours of being seen, delirious and feverish. As for being greedy and demeaning, he'd have to discover those on his own but the more he hung out with her, talked to her and argued with her, Ruka couldn't help but be stunned at how human she was.

_Human…_

That was a good word to describe her.

"_Ruka-sama likes her." _Usagi sniffed, padding to his feet, watching with his master as the black-haired girl descended down the hill. _"She may not be one of us or like the other one we liked, but if Ruka-sama likes her, Usagi likes her too." _As an afterthought, he added, _"She smells nice."_

Then with an affectionate nibble, he'd bounded after her, startling Ruka out of his thoughts and into the run as well. He could see her back stiffening when she stopped, but a second later, she started in the direction to the girls' dorm once again, mumbling something low under her breath that even Ruka's ears couldn't pick up.

That didn't bug him, though. Just the sound of her voice making incoherent noises made her all the more adorable.

"You're not mad, are you?"

She whirled around, violet eyes flashing. "Nogi, you're an _idiot_. The words that come out of your mouth are always stupid and yo—"

He didn't know what made him do it. He could think about it years from then and still wonder how the hell he managed to move his body without his brain having a clue but Ruka had an inkling that it may have had to do with the fact that he could feel the warmth of her anger radiating off of her body and could smell the light ambrosia still lingering on her skin.

Her voice, once so calm, was biting and the words that were coming out of her mouth were less than flattering, but just the flustered tone she had made a tingle of desire run down his spine.

Her black hair was messy from the wind and there was a little bump of stray bangs that were caught in her clip that made her look ridiculous, but Ruka barely even noticed. He was too busy noticing the way her cheeks pinked from the wind or her anger, either way, it tantalized him. _And those eyes, dammit…_

God but she was beautiful.

He couldn't _stand_ it.

"—I bet you aren't even listening, are yo—"

He kissed her, practically crushing their lips together. Ruka didn't know why he felt so desperate for this, but just a touch of the lips and he was already burning. He'd never kissed a girl before other than his mum and Mikan on the cheek but this… weren't these things supposed to be soft and gentle?

All thought abandoned him when Hotaru shivered, biting his lip gently before returning his kiss with soft ones of her own. Her eyelashes fluttered against the skin of his cheeks and he could feel one of her warm hands grip the fabric of his shirt.

Ruka hadn't known what to expect and granted, ten seconds ago, he hadn't even known he'd be kissing her like this. It was Hotaru Imai, god dammit. She wasn't _supposed_ to smell like ambrosia and feel this warm. She wasn't supposed to taste like … what word could describe the taste of her? It was something lighter than toffee and warm like vanilla and just something that he couldn't word other than to call it very Hotaru.

Was it supposed to feel this special, the first kiss?

It felt like a new world was opening up with hidden potential and no apparent direction, like a new story where Ruka had no clue what to expect. All he could do was wade through it blindly and hope for the best but …

She was devastating.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she snapped dryly, after they'd caught their breath and after she'd managed to put about a meter distance between them.

"Nothing," he grinned, not minding the confusion in Usagi's thoughts.

"This doesn't change a thing," Hotaru reminded sharply, setting a quick pace. "I still don't like you very much."

"Alright."

She shot him an aggravated look over her shoulder before her expression smoothed back into the indifference he was so used to.

But Hotaru wasn't fooling him anymore. She could pretend and hide behind that mask she held so dear but he'd already gotten a glimpse of the person that lie underneath and _man_, was she something.

He didn't love her, to say the least. That would've been ridiculous. Ruka did, however, like the fact that she'd shown him small fragments of how human she was. It was only a matter of time before he discovered it all.

Was this how Hotaru had felt all those times she'd walked away as the victor of their arguments? He would've never known it would feel _this _good to catch her off guard for once and if Ruka was being honest with himself, he couldn't wait to do it again.

It was probably bad that he was feeling ridiculously excited to pick up one of her bad habits but staggering _the_ Hotaru Imai was definitely a defining moment in his life, as pathetic as it may sound.

And for the first time in a long while, Ruka felt that maybe the cogs of the world's axis were finally going to work smoothly from now on.

Or dammit, at least he hoped.

* * *

She could see it on his face, the deliriously happy grin.

He thought he'd been able to win against her?

Inwardly, Hotaru snorted.

Phases one, two, three and four moved along just nicely, though the last two didn't go quite according to what she'd planned.

No matter, phase five had been completed to _perfection_.

Hotaru glanced to her left at the ridiculously happy boy and couldn't help the satisfied smirk that immediately made its way onto her lips. Really, sometimes Nogi was just _too _easy. Granted, he'd managed to catch her off guard with his unexpected outburst, but turning the tables had been far easier than she'd imagined. It helped that Mikan had reacted just as she'd expected. _She'd probably have to get her a hefty Christmas present for this_… But getting Ruka Nogi was well worth it.

Honestly, if there was one thing displeasing about the whole ordeal, it was the fact that she'd won against Ruka without him _knowing_, so she couldn't even patronize him for it. Then again, everyone had to make sacrifices, she thought, even hefty ones like hers in order to win the prize.

_The prize_…

It was almost disgusting, the inexplicable crush she had on Nogi. What was there to like about him that made him so special from the others? Hotaru didn't know but thought, if it _were_ anybody else, she wouldn't have had to go to such great heights to get what she wanted. And it was only a matter of time before she got what she wanted. Hotaru always made sure of that.

She was quick, she was calculating and she was always one step ahead.

She was Hotaru Imai, after all.

A force to be reckoned with and all that.

_And_…

Inwardly, she chuckled.

…_Yes, she had known Ruka would be hers by June…_

_... __**a**__n__**d**__ t__**h**__e __**r**__e__**s**__t __**i**__s __**s**__t__**i**__l__**l**__ u__**n**__w__**r**__i__**t**__t__**e**__n..._

* * *

**Author's Note:**

_Oh man, I've always pictured this story ending something like that. Seeing this dream turning into a reality kinda rocks. XD  
_  
_I know I wrote this story in mostly the Third Person Limited (Ruka's) point of view, but man, Hotaru didn't really get to show the readers her thoughts so that last scene was just a **taste** (get it, taste? XD) of what it'd be like if I ever got around to writing a story in Hotaru's (third person limited) point of view. Plus, crimsoneyes44? Yeah, I know how much you love her. :)  
_

_WOOT, that was the **last** chapter and I sincerely hope you liked my first RukaHotaru story. Though I've gotten some requests, I'll be thinking about whether or not another RukaHotaru story will find a place in my writing agenda. I have to admit, I have some ideas but let's just wait 'til I've finished TBATB, hm?  
_

_Thank you to everyone that read and reviewed, I really, really appreciate it. I especially loved the reactions I got from Ruka's delirium and the theme of the chapters. Yes, it had to do with the senses: smell, sound, touch, sight and taste, so kudos to those that managed to get it.  
_

_Oh holy moe, I can't believe I got over 100 favorites for a five-chaptered story, too. It's insane!_

_Thank you, thank you, thank you very much!You guys are **way** too awesome!  
**  
So**_… _how __**about**__ a __**review**__ for __**old**__ time's__** sake**__?_

_

* * *

_

_My Hopeless Romantic_

_Completed: June 7, 2009_


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